“Being queer felt fluid and free,” says Cara Delevingne

The model and actress weighs in on sex, love, and being your true self.

Stark Raving

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Photo from Instagram — Courtesy of Cara Delevingne

It was at the Dinah Shore weekend in Palm Springs that Cara Delevingne had her first real experience of queerness as a community, rather than an identity. The music festival describes itself as “the largest lesbian/queer women event in the world”, or, as New York Times writes, “lesbian paradise”. It is a marathon of a pool party, with dancing, music, love, and women being empowered and empowering each other. For Cara, it was like being thrown in the deep end.

She tells BBC that, while she has long known that she is queer, growing up in the spotlight meant that she hadn’t experienced certain elements of LGBTQ+ culture. “I haven’t really been able to live a queer life,” she said. “When you are in this job, it stunts a lot of things. I was never really in the community. I never went to Pride, never went to those parties.”

It is all the more difficult for young celebrities because they are often living a public life even as they go through the private process of figuring out their own sexuality. “At that time, I was still having trouble swallowing that pill myself,” said Cara. “It wasn’t even the fact it was going to be on the front page of a newspaper, it was ‘what if my family sees?’”

Today, Cara identifies as queer, but finding the term that fit the way she felt was a journey. “I kind of started as bisexual, and then I was pansexual”. While she related to the LGBTQ+ community, she says it took her a while to work out “which letter” she was. “Queer felt fluid and free. It didn’t put too much pressure on anything I was deciding to be.” In Planet Sex, she shares more about her sexuality:

“Sexuality is definitely a spectrum, and I feel like mine wavers, but I’m definitely more on the side of women. I like having sex with men, I just don’t date them.”

Cara attended Dinah Shore as part of the filming of her upcoming documentary, series Planet Sex, in which she travels the globe, talking to scientists, activists and artists about the meaning of gender, sexuality, attraction and love. “I want people to have the sort of conversations that are in the show. I think hate and fear come from things that are not spoken about, or fears about questions,” says Cara.

I’m definitely looking forward to watching the show! The more we talk about these topics, the better.

The first episode of Planet Sex will air on BBC Three on Thursday, December 1st, and will be released on BBC iPlayer.

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Stark Raving

Intersectional feminism and environmental issues. Let’s make the world a kinder, more sustainable place. Support my work! https://starkraving.medium.com/members